The essay , Welcome to Holland was written by a mom of a down syndrome child. For kids with behavior challenges - Beirut and the chaos might be more closer to reality , but with challenging kids I think there is also more hope and possibilities of learning and growth so they do become responsible and caring adults , not so with down syndrome . Down syndrome kids will always live in Holland , but parents of challenging kids want to equip them with the skills so they can live independently in Italy. However , reliance on ABA is not going to get autistic children very far on the journey , because the approach teaches skills they way we teach dogs tricks.
Beirut has great potential . I think they call Beirut the Paris of the middle east but problems between members of the Lebanese family does not give much hope over there. When there was internal peace , Beirut was amazing.
Ultimately being positive and seeing the positive will depend on the color of the lenses we wear and what picture we paint of the world. You also have to see that you have started your journey and are moving in the right direction towards Italy.
It is tough , but often it is one of the parents who has to create ' the joy of life in the home , the music, the dance , the hope - despite our kids we should be coping better .
This is pretty important especially if you are trying to ' work with the child ' rather than using tough love , consequences etc . A lot of moms get blamed by not being firm enough and letting kids manipulate them , that they are too soft. The dhs - dear husbands then look for the quick fixes that will teach the kid an everlasting lesson. Moms realize that trying to break a kid into submission will just lead to more conflict and chaos . If you want to convince your dh otherwise , one needs to cope better and believe in the path you are travelling , no matter how slow the progress , but when you are stressing out , dh will see this as a sign to do something different
Welcome to Holland
http://www.journeyofhearts.org/kirstimd/holland.htm
Welcome to Beirut poem
http://www.bbbautism.com/beginners_beirut.htm
http://www.autism-help.org/story-holland-schmolland.htm
Allan
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